“As for Mr. Sandler, I have always been interested in what he would do next, and I suppose I still am, especially if what he does next is retire.”
- Going Over the Top, Then Downhill. November 10, 2011
“As for Mr. Sandler, I have always been interested in what he would do next, and I suppose I still am, especially if what he does next is retire.”
- Going Over the Top, Then Downhill. November 10, 2011
“I can’t decide if this movie is so spectacularly, breathtakingly dumb as to induce stupidity in anyone who watches, or so brutally brilliant that it disarms all reason.”
“Mr. Bay’s lax notions of coherence and plausibility — I’m sorry, I mean his utterly nonexistent notions of coherence and plausibility…”
“Mr. LaBeouf, who is his own annoying sidekick…”
“I’m not judging, just describing.”
- One Small Step for Man, One Giant Leap for Autobots. June 28, 2011
“Have I spoiled anything? If you are 7, maybe.”
A Noble Panda Takes On a Nightmare Enemy. May 25, 2011
“Never have I needed a drink so badly.”
- A Lush Life Revisited, With Nanny on Board, April 7, 2011
“…the filmmakers seem to have misplaced their supply of coherence pills.”
- A Simple Prescription for Superior Powers March 17, 2011
“It’s not really as confusing as it all sounds, but it is hard to escape the feeling that Mr. Reitman shot six or seven movies and then went into the editing room blindfolded to splice them all together.”
- Firmly Committed to Casual, January 20, 2011
“To ask if Mr. Vaughn and Ms. Connelly have any chemistry is to invoke the wrong science; extreme disparities of size and shape suggest, instead, a fascinating problem of zoology, as if a whippet had decided to cohabit with a yak.”
- A Guy Thing? Not That Kind. And Not That Kind Either, January 13, 2011
“Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part 1” is rated PG-13 (Parents strongly cautioned). Dark arts, rough magic.
- Time for Young Wizards to Put Away Childish Things, November 18, 2010
“I saw the best poems of previous generations destroyed by sanity, well-fed, calm, neatly dressed, tiptoeing through lecture halls at 10 a.m. looking for a passing grade on a term paper.”
- Leaping Off the Page, a Beatnik’s Poetic Rant, September 23, 2010
“Welcome to the future of cinema.”
- The Fish Are Really Biting Those Women in Bikinis, August 22, 2010
“Voice-over narration, tracking shots through teeming nightclubs and an occasional song on the soundtrack do not make you Martin Scorsese.”
- A Purveyor of Prurience in a Family-Man Guise, August 5, 2010
“Certain logical questions do arise. For example, when a living person plays catch with an apparition from beyond the grave, visible only to him, do they use a real baseball?”
-Playing With Phantoms in the Northwest Woods, July 29, 2010
“Wearing what look like prosthetic teeth purchased from Ye Olde Peter Sellers Gagge Shoppe, Mr. Carell plays a man so utterly clueless…”
- What? We Might Be the Real Losers?, July 29, 2010
“A whole new vocabulary seems to be required. To say that the movie is not funny is merely to affirm the obvious. The word “unfunny” surely applies to Mr. Myers’s obnoxious attempts to find mirth in physical and cultural differences but does not quite capture the strenuous unpleasantness of his performance. No, “The Love Guru” is downright antifunny, an experience that makes you wonder if you will ever laugh again.”
- Just Say ‘Mariska Hargitay’ and Snicker, June 20, 2008
Thanks to Kareem for sending this elegant bodyblow my way.